Self Injury, Self Harm.

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This is a controversial topic to write about. Yet, it is something that is absolutely necessary. When we think about the self-harming process, the usual progression of thought leads to the cutting of a wrist – a temporary relief system for someone who is suffering. Inflicting physical pain on oneself can provide an escape from persistent psychological pain. I’m talking from experience. I’ve been down this path, and yes, it did provide a small escape. Some intermittent relief. Well, that was until I felt unavoidable shame regarding my actions. It resulted in further grief and emotional suffering. A year went past before I began to realise that the process of self-harm was a causative factor in my long-term emotional overloading. It was triggering a negative cycle of events, which inevitably prolonged my recovery process. Continue reading “Self Injury, Self Harm.”

New Beginnings (Vlog)

With 2018 well underway, I decided to put a vlog together. It has been over a month since my last post, primarily due to some personal battles. We all have things we have to fight through, and now I have successfully battled through to the other side of mine, I decided to create this.

I hope everyone is enjoying their 2018 so far, and thank you for your continued reading.

 

To care is to be vulnerable.

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Do you care about anything? Looking back into human history, even the most putrid of individuals cared about something. Caring is an indirect confirmation of vulnerability. It may be highlighted through an achievement, or a particularly difficult loss. Family, work, hobbies, health…we are all vulnerable in some manner. Yes, guys, that means us, too. Pretending that we are about as emotional as a lump of sedimentary rock is restrictive, fictitious, and downright hazardous to our personal wellbeing. Continue reading “To care is to be vulnerable.”

Freedom: the core component of anxiety.

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Anxiety is simply a subdivision of fear; primarily of the future, or simply arising as a reaction to current events. However, would this fear be diminished if our freedom was somewhat removed? When I take a retrospective look at anxious moments in my life, most of these are intercalated with the freedom of choice. Going to University, studying abroad, travelling alone; all of these initially filled me with dread, despite the obvious fact that I didn’t have to go through with any of them. Conversely, in situations that I have absolutely no control over, anxiety tends to remain minimal. For example, the past. No matter how much an individual begins to dwell on past mistakes, they cannot be altered. Getting old is also a good example. Of course, the natural exception associated with age is our inevitable death. The anxiety that arises from this (for me, anyway) is associated with whether I manage to enjoy a happy, successful, and fulfilling life. The aging process itself though, and the experiences that are associated with it, fill me with interest. I am curious to see where the path leads. Continue reading “Freedom: the core component of anxiety.”

Fear does not stop death, it stops life.

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Fear, at its worst, only deals in absolutes. An entirely crippling entity, its very nature can annihilate any previous confidence going into an activity or situation. Yet, it never directly alters what you’re scared of. Think about that for a second. Sure, in a job interview or a college exam, fear plays its part in the nerve-wracking tension that ultimately tends to boil over as you fiddle, pace and overthink. This, of course, is normal for everyone. It’s the extended period of fear, alongside concurrent personal scaremongering which can have the least favourable consequences. Continue reading “Fear does not stop death, it stops life.”

The art of creating problems that do not exist.

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Overthinking. We all do it. We all try our best to stay positive and remain optimistic. Occasionally however, we fall through a trapdoor infested with negativity that all too frequently emerges beneath our feet. That persistent obsession to worry about, and over-analyse past experiences – experiences, by the way, that we can’t just miraculously eradicate from existence. Current stresses on the other hand, we CAN adapt for. Nevertheless, we still read into things that just aren’t there. If you often find yourself doing this, psychologists refer to you as a ruminator, or overthinker. My defining example of this would be the stereotypical ‘first date’ scenario – and due to its relevance, I will use myself as an example. Continue reading “The art of creating problems that do not exist.”

It’s time to stop pretending.

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I came to a disconcerting revelation recently. That is, I actively avoid giving myself time alone with my own thoughts. I continuously preoccupy myself either with work or friends. All the while, I ignored the fact that I haven’t given myself time away from the world to just sit and reflect. Meditation was, for me, an incredible relaxant and stress reliever for a period. Now however, I pretend like I simply do not have time for it. Why?

The answer to this seemingly convoluted question is simple. I do not want to admit that depression negatively impacts my daily life. Instead, I like to take on other people’s problems. A primary reason for this is because I do not want to be left to tackle my own. Continue reading “It’s time to stop pretending.”